Let your children read your will first

Legendary investor Warren Buffett offers smart estate planning advice for all parents, regardless of their wealth level: Let your adult children read your will before signing it.

In a revealing November 2024 letter to shareholders, the CEO of Berkshire Hathaway (BRK.A) explained that this simple act can prevent family conflicts and strengthen relationships after the death of a parent.

“Over the years, I have received questions or comments from my three children, and I have often adopted their suggestions,” Buffett wrote. “There’s nothing wrong with having to defend my ideas. My father did the same to me.”

Why is sharing your will important?

Buffett’s advice stems from decades of observing families torn apart by unexpected or confusing inheritance decisions. When children discover the contents of a will only after their parents’ deaths, questions about fairness and memories of childhood favoritism can arise, potentially damaging sibling relationships forever.

“Although it’s important to have well-written estate documents, we see most estate planning get sidetracked by emotional issues,” Mitchell Krause, a certified financial planner at Capital Intelligence Associates, told Investopedia. “For most families, the best way to ensure there are no fights after death is to have intergenerational conversations.”

Buffett said parents should be prepared to defend their choices and listen to their children’s input while they are still alive, just as his father did with him.

Make changes and take notes

The “Oracle of Omaha” practices what he preaches. He said he updates his will every two years, sometimes making minor amendments based on conversations with his three children. He said this helped his family maintain strong relationships while managing the responsibilities that come with inheriting a large fortune. In fact, Buffett believes that openly discussing inheritance plans can help families grow closer rather than apart.

“Make sure each child understands the logic of your decisions and the responsibilities they will face upon your death,” Buffett wrote. “If anyone has questions or suggestions, listen carefully and adopt those you find reasonable. You don’t want your children to ask ‘why?’ regarding will decisions when you are not able to respond.”

Bottom line

“The biggest stumbling block is often the unwillingness of older generations to address the possibility of problems,” Kraus said. Buffett suggests that parents disclose their wills to their children before finalizing them to prevent family conflicts in the future. This reflects his broader beliefs about inheritance management and family communication: parents who discuss such decisions openly and seek input from their adult children can avoid misunderstandings and build stronger family bonds while ensuring their wishes are well understood.

Buffett’s estate planning strategy could be an opportunity for meaningful family discussions rather than potential disagreement. But what if your family relationships are already hot? The professionals have a way of dealing with that too. “For dysfunctional families, we recommend professionals who will run family meetings and make sure things don’t get out of hand,” Kraus said.