‘Quite frankly, we’ve got nothing to lose’: How the UK is faring strangely for its 2026 Eurovision entry | Eurovision 2026

TI have to be told, this probably won’t be a great Eurovision contest. Five countries – Iceland, Ireland, the Netherlands, Slovenia and Spain – are boycotting the contest due to Israel’s continued annexation. Additionally, and perhaps not coincidentally, television viewership is falling to the ground. In 2024, BBC coverage lost a quarter of its annual viewers, and last year a million more left it.

But there is good news on the horizon. The UK has just announced its entry this year, and it seems we’ve responded to all this existential uncertainty by behaving in a strange way. Looks like this is going to be the year of Look at the Computer-Free Mom.

Described by the BBC as “a multi-talented solo artist, experimental singer-songwriter, live electronic player and composer, inventor of unique musical instruments and Eurovision fan”, Look Mum No Computer is the pseudonym of former Zebra frontman Sam Battle. He’s built a dedicated army of subscribers on his YouTube channel, which includes videos showing him restoring a 1929 car and composing a piece of music for abandoned synthesizers, AKA The Binmen’s Lament.

Now, depending on how you look at things, this is either a very smart move by the UK or clear evidence of everything that is wrong with the world. For those in the latter group, the Eurovision Song Contest remains a respectably mainstream music competition, the home of Cliff Richards, Lulu, and The Brotherhood. I suspect one reaction to the Look Mum No Computer ad would be along the lines of: “Why don’t we go into the oasis and smash it?”

Which would be missing the point a little. For starters, the last thing Oasis wants is to finish 15th in a European singing competition (which they will, because European distrust of the British runs deeper than any love of nostalgic 90s indie music). Also, Oasis will stick out like a sore thumb at Eurovision, much more so than See Mum Without a Computer.

Just look at some of the measures other countries have announced this year. Greece has introduced an 8-bit techno song performed by someone who sounds as if his day job is entertaining kids dressed as Elmo. Denmark put a goth in a fish tank. Moldova has introduced a song literally called “Long Live Moldova!”, a move that will resonate only with the people of Moldova.

The point is that Eurovision is no longer ABBA’s home. It’s now home to entries like Latvia’s 2022 song Eat Your Salad, the original version of which included the lyrics “Instead of meat, I eat veggies and pussy,” and, quite frankly, it’s time to try and keep up.

In the last 15 years, the UK has only cracked the Eurovision top 10 once, with Sam Ryder in 2022. Aside from that, none of our strategies have worked. We experienced nostalgia, only to watch Bonnie Tyler come in 19th and Engelbert Humperdinck in 25th. We tried to get into reality TV shows and saw Lucy Jones who came in 15th place and Michael Rice in last place. Even fitting things in perfectly with the current mood of Eurovision, as we did with Olly Alexander in 2024, couldn’t get us higher than 18th.

So, quite frankly, we have nothing to lose. And if that means entering a man who runs a museum of “experimental and anachronistic scientific and musical technology” in Ramsgate and whose name makes me die a little every time I have to type it, so be it. We’re going to lose anyway, so what the hell.

However, let’s maintain some hope. All we know is that Look Mum, No Computer has entered the Eurovision contest. We haven’t heard a song yet. It might be a banger. It could go on to redefine what Eurovision is. I expect it will definitely be unique.

The latest video on the Look Mum No Computer YouTube channel is a clip from a concert, where he tries to put a Blur song together himself, on a bunch of old electronic instruments. It’s fascinating to watch, as if Ed Sheeran had accidentally joined the BBC Radiophonic Workshop. Plus, it must be said that the (German) audience went crazy because of it. That must be worth a try, right?